Tuesday, December 31, 2019

The Year-End Reflections of 2019

Fuck 2019. If anyone is going to come to me, my mother, or my sister about the year and how good it was, we’re likely to kill you where you stand. It fucking sucked. Despite the fact that I gained a nephew in Mateo whom I’ve grown fond of, the passing of my dad at the end of June killed the year for me, my mother, my sister, and everyone who knew my dad. The first half was tough considering that he was going through esophagus cancer as we thought he was doing fine but because of complications involving the recovery of the surgery. Things went to shit as my dad became miserable in his final days about not having to eat the food he loves or drink a beer every once in a while. That’s not life and what’s the point of life if you can’t enjoy the little things? In some ways, my sister, my mother, and I are glad he’s gone because he didn’t have to suffer in not having to enjoy those things. Still, it is tough not having him around as it’s something I know have to deal with until my mother passes. Even as I’m dealing with an awful flu as I’ve been vomiting for the past few days, I just hope things can’t get any worse.

Due to the events of the year as it was filled with so much bullshit and people acting like idiots to the point that I stopped going to certain websites and places on the net that I used to go to because I have no more patience for that bullshit. My dad’s passing forced me to look at some of the good things in life and as a result, I decided to step away from the shit that made me miserable and also clean out my closet of all of that bullshit. With Mateo being a joy in my life now, it has given me some kind of distraction as I also felt the need to not watch films for a while as my overall output has dwindled. In the year of 2019, I saw a total of 342 films in 161 first-timers and 181 re-watches with 17 of the first-timers being films directed by women as part of the 52 Films by Women pledge with 15 films that I saw in the theaters which was similar to the number of films I saw in the theaters last year. Not bad considering the circumstances as I’ll maybe go for 350 films for the next year. The highlight of the year have been my Blind Spots as here are the final ranking of the films of the 2019 Blind Spot Series:

1. Shoah

2. My Neighbor Totoro

3. The Gleaners and I

4. Mishima: A Life in Four Chapters

5. In the Realm of the Senses

6. To Sleep with Anger

7. This is Not a Film

8. Weekend

9. All About Eve

10. Gilda

11. Marketa Lazarova

12. Gone with the Wind

One of the joys of film-watching is getting the chance films from different genres and different places that have been made with some new discoveries along the way. Here are my top 35 pre-2010 first-timers that I saw for 2019:

1. Mamma Roma

2. The Passion of Anna

3. Medium Cool

4. Branded to Kill

5. Kuroneko

6. Bullitt

7. Two or Three Things I Know About Her

8. Magnet of Doom

9. An Autumn Afternoon

10. Death of a Cyclist

11. Alexander Nevsky

12. The 39 Steps

13. The Face of Another

14. Young Mr. Lincoln

15. My Night at Maud's

16. Midnight Express

17. King of New York

18. Mostly Martha

19. The World

20. Eating Raoul

21. The Green Ray

22. Mysterious Object at Noon

23. The End of Summer

24. Secrets of Women

25. Ghost in the Shell

26. Unknown Pleasures

27. The Man Who Knew Too Much

28. Oliver Twist

29. Querelle

30. Claire's Knee

31. Madeleine

32. Love in the Afternoon

33. Pitfall

34. La collectionneuse

35. River of Grass

That is all for 2019 as other joys involve the Atlanta Braves winning another division championship to spite the critics who say they weren’t going to win another one. The Atlanta United despite changes in management still won me over as they’ve been solid while All Elite Wrestling, NWA, and New Japan Pro Wrestling have become great alternatives to the dumpster fire that is WWE. It’s been a strange decade that began with me going through a severe depression and now ending on a down note as I’m suffering from the flu and missing my dad. Until then, this is thevoid99 signing off and wishing those who are good people a Happy New Year and a Happy New Decade and as for everyone else I don’t care about…. Here’s what you get…

© thevoid99 2019


Chris said...

Must be tough not having your dad around. All the best to you and your family for 2020. Hope the flu passes soon.
I need to find time to watch Shoah and Mishima. Midnight Express is a great prison movie. More people should watch Teshigahara’s films, he's one of the most interesting Japanese filmmakers.

thevoid99 said...

@Chris-Thank you. This flu has been kicking my ass as I've been coughing and vomiting a lot of phlegm. I hate it. My mother has it, her cousin has it, my sister has it, and her husband has it. It fucking sucks. Shoah did take up a lot of my time last month but I don't regret it as it's a must for anyone who loves cinema.

Katy said...

I'm sorry for everything that you've gone through, especially your family losing your dad. I wish you the best for the new year in whichever way life could be easier on you and your family moving forward. Also, iconic use of Johnny at the end too. :)